Why I stopped Multi Level Marketing
This post has been on my mind for a while now mostly because I'm finding out how the real world works, and some of it isn't pretty. Including the MLM world. Some people still ask me from time to time if im still working on "my buisness" or why i stopped so,
I guess I should start with it is a big fat LIE.
I started my journey with a company who sell health and fitness products.
I was firstly introduced into the world by someone I knew, I grew uncomfortable, started working with someone else who I didn't know, even more uncomfortable and still didn't accept the bizzare feeling.
You see, I wanted to help people. That's what I realised. And helping people doesn't make a good sales lady, in any way.
It all started going mostly down hill when I invited my dad to a presentation. To his adorable credit, he came, knowing all about what it was going to be about.
I was under no illusion that it wasn't a "pyramid style" selling system but I didn't mind as long as the products benefited people.
My dad listened to the presentation until the end, and then proceeded to ask for evidence for the information that's just been given, like any sane and intelligent person would do.
I had only found anecdotal evidence which I believe carries weight, but this presentation didn't even show that.
The person who was our "mentor" above us, answered that the information was just "out there". My dad said that wasn't good enough, and almost became visibly frustrated with someone who claimed things were just "out there".
I apologised for his questioning because I could see her getting uncomfortable but I have no idea why I did. I am embarrassed that I did. He was right for many reasons.
Never the less, I figured I would just find the evidence myself and my dad said he would support whatever I wanted to do, so much so he gave me the last 65 quid to buy my starter kit because I had raised the rest through selling products before I had even got them.
I went into it with fully swing and I loved it, but became aware very quickly that it was a bit of a facade. I didn't mind too much because I wasn't interested in having people "under me", I just wanted to sell the products and help people with their problems.
The person immediately above me was very pushy for me to "build a buisness" and even disclosed that the person above her bought her box for her. I assume she was trying to give me the "We help each other, and look after each other vibe" (which later on I realised contributed a hefty amount of credits for their own business)
I went to a few "build your business" meetings which were honestly not much more than "you must be a positive robot, harrass anyone and everyone but make it seem like it's genuine and don't have any emotions" The only face you're allowed to wear is a smile.
I was taught the very same techniques and tips used on me so I could use them on everyone else.
I had been had. I knew it and ignored it because I didn't need or want to work with anyone else to do anything more than my own thing but deep down, that uneasy feeling didn't leave.
There was clear manipulation, "back stabbing", dishonesty and hurtfulness in my experience with it and I decided from then on I had had enough.
I would even go as far as to say I was bullied.
Though I cannot blame that on MLM, I believe you have to be a certain type of person to be *successful at something which is pretty much imaginary.
Something so ingenuine was soul destroying and made me quite stressed and miserable.
* Earning atleast a little more than what you're putting into it.
Thankfully, I wasn't the only person who felt like this. Some may still be doing it now, some may still be trying and some may still be pretending that they are doing better than they are, but that's what the internet is all about. They were the people who I made friends with. The people who didn't want to "trick" people into joining them without all the facts, let people down, dissapoint them, con them. The type of people I like.
Over all, It was such a shame because within the first couple of months, I really cared about helping people and what I was doing. I made money and it made me happy when other people were, but I wouldnt lie about products or convince them that it was "the best thing ever".
Lotion is lotion.
I ended up making peace with my body and decided what in the shit gives me the right to promote a product that people want to lose weight with. I didn't want to encourage that.
Everything started to feel toxic. The people, the atmosphere and you could tell my heart had left it long before I had.
I wrote this status on my business page 5 months before I actually decided not to work on it again in 2014:
"Body shaming is body shaming.
it doesnt matter if you have big boobs, small thighs, large thighs, round tummy, flat tummy, small boobs, big bum. Whether you are an hour glass, a "pencil" whatever the hell that is, a pear, a ruler (pretty sure thats the same as pencil) or whatever fruit or other stationary you want to throw out there.
Everyone is beautiful. I think people should shutup with this whole " real women have curves" or "fit is the new skinny" and all of those ridiculous sayings.
If you wana get fit, get fit! dont just get fit cos its the "new thing to do"
If you have curves, awesome.
If you dont, awesome.
Not having certain curves does NOT make you any less "real" or any less of a woman. It makes you AWESOME.
And having big boobs or a big bum doesnt make you any more real... it makes you AWESOME.
Why must we all come up with these ridiculous sayings to make ourselves feel better?
Who came up with the dumb idea that we have to have some form of a label for what our body looks like, or why its better than someone elses.
Love your body, love yourself, f*** everything else"
I was tired of seeing "Want to lose 10 pounds and look amazing?" I was tired of seeing people having twisted truth presented to them, I was tired of seeing and being a part of something that didn't matter, that wasn't even real. This includes stuff like presentations on basically nothing more than fake what you're doing, achieving until people are so curious they will either be jealous or ask you for a meeting.
I couldn't fake it and in someways I felt guilty if someone wanted to join me. Why bother joining someone who's been doing it 6 months when you could join someone who's been doing it 6 years and has "a name" in the business. Whatever that means.
I even got congratulated because the presentations I put together were very different from other peoples, because they were honest and offered both sides of the coin.
Everytime I see a new person pop up with a product or a "home office", a little part of me dies.
I hope that someone cares and isn't playing them like a puppet. I hope they listen to their concerns and not just tell them they aren't being positive enough or don't have enough goals. I really hope they don't feel like they fail and they listen if something doesn't feel right.
Don't get me wrong, I can't tar everyone with the same brush, and people earn money from it, sometimes the very large amounts that are expressed could be yours. I however, wouldn't want to be the person I have personally seen you have to be to achieve it.
I now work on being a body positive activist whenever I can, I study psychology and write professionally. I am still "my own boss", I still get to work in bed the majority of the time and I think now I have a better chance of helping people and being happy than I ever did before.
I guess I should start with it is a big fat LIE.
I started my journey with a company who sell health and fitness products.
I was firstly introduced into the world by someone I knew, I grew uncomfortable, started working with someone else who I didn't know, even more uncomfortable and still didn't accept the bizzare feeling.
You see, I wanted to help people. That's what I realised. And helping people doesn't make a good sales lady, in any way.
It all started going mostly down hill when I invited my dad to a presentation. To his adorable credit, he came, knowing all about what it was going to be about.
I was under no illusion that it wasn't a "pyramid style" selling system but I didn't mind as long as the products benefited people.
My dad listened to the presentation until the end, and then proceeded to ask for evidence for the information that's just been given, like any sane and intelligent person would do.
I had only found anecdotal evidence which I believe carries weight, but this presentation didn't even show that.
The person who was our "mentor" above us, answered that the information was just "out there". My dad said that wasn't good enough, and almost became visibly frustrated with someone who claimed things were just "out there".
I apologised for his questioning because I could see her getting uncomfortable but I have no idea why I did. I am embarrassed that I did. He was right for many reasons.
Never the less, I figured I would just find the evidence myself and my dad said he would support whatever I wanted to do, so much so he gave me the last 65 quid to buy my starter kit because I had raised the rest through selling products before I had even got them.
I went into it with fully swing and I loved it, but became aware very quickly that it was a bit of a facade. I didn't mind too much because I wasn't interested in having people "under me", I just wanted to sell the products and help people with their problems.
The person immediately above me was very pushy for me to "build a buisness" and even disclosed that the person above her bought her box for her. I assume she was trying to give me the "We help each other, and look after each other vibe" (which later on I realised contributed a hefty amount of credits for their own business)
I went to a few "build your business" meetings which were honestly not much more than "you must be a positive robot, harrass anyone and everyone but make it seem like it's genuine and don't have any emotions" The only face you're allowed to wear is a smile.
I was taught the very same techniques and tips used on me so I could use them on everyone else.
I had been had. I knew it and ignored it because I didn't need or want to work with anyone else to do anything more than my own thing but deep down, that uneasy feeling didn't leave.
There was clear manipulation, "back stabbing", dishonesty and hurtfulness in my experience with it and I decided from then on I had had enough.
I would even go as far as to say I was bullied.
Though I cannot blame that on MLM, I believe you have to be a certain type of person to be *successful at something which is pretty much imaginary.
Something so ingenuine was soul destroying and made me quite stressed and miserable.
* Earning atleast a little more than what you're putting into it.
Thankfully, I wasn't the only person who felt like this. Some may still be doing it now, some may still be trying and some may still be pretending that they are doing better than they are, but that's what the internet is all about. They were the people who I made friends with. The people who didn't want to "trick" people into joining them without all the facts, let people down, dissapoint them, con them. The type of people I like.
Over all, It was such a shame because within the first couple of months, I really cared about helping people and what I was doing. I made money and it made me happy when other people were, but I wouldnt lie about products or convince them that it was "the best thing ever".
Lotion is lotion.
I ended up making peace with my body and decided what in the shit gives me the right to promote a product that people want to lose weight with. I didn't want to encourage that.
Everything started to feel toxic. The people, the atmosphere and you could tell my heart had left it long before I had.
I wrote this status on my business page 5 months before I actually decided not to work on it again in 2014:
"Body shaming is body shaming.
it doesnt matter if you have big boobs, small thighs, large thighs, round tummy, flat tummy, small boobs, big bum. Whether you are an hour glass, a "pencil" whatever the hell that is, a pear, a ruler (pretty sure thats the same as pencil) or whatever fruit or other stationary you want to throw out there.
Everyone is beautiful. I think people should shutup with this whole " real women have curves" or "fit is the new skinny" and all of those ridiculous sayings.
If you wana get fit, get fit! dont just get fit cos its the "new thing to do"
If you have curves, awesome.
If you dont, awesome.
Not having certain curves does NOT make you any less "real" or any less of a woman. It makes you AWESOME.
And having big boobs or a big bum doesnt make you any more real... it makes you AWESOME.
Why must we all come up with these ridiculous sayings to make ourselves feel better?
Who came up with the dumb idea that we have to have some form of a label for what our body looks like, or why its better than someone elses.
Love your body, love yourself, f*** everything else"
I was tired of seeing "Want to lose 10 pounds and look amazing?" I was tired of seeing people having twisted truth presented to them, I was tired of seeing and being a part of something that didn't matter, that wasn't even real. This includes stuff like presentations on basically nothing more than fake what you're doing, achieving until people are so curious they will either be jealous or ask you for a meeting.
I couldn't fake it and in someways I felt guilty if someone wanted to join me. Why bother joining someone who's been doing it 6 months when you could join someone who's been doing it 6 years and has "a name" in the business. Whatever that means.
I even got congratulated because the presentations I put together were very different from other peoples, because they were honest and offered both sides of the coin.
Everytime I see a new person pop up with a product or a "home office", a little part of me dies.
I hope that someone cares and isn't playing them like a puppet. I hope they listen to their concerns and not just tell them they aren't being positive enough or don't have enough goals. I really hope they don't feel like they fail and they listen if something doesn't feel right.
Don't get me wrong, I can't tar everyone with the same brush, and people earn money from it, sometimes the very large amounts that are expressed could be yours. I however, wouldn't want to be the person I have personally seen you have to be to achieve it.
I now work on being a body positive activist whenever I can, I study psychology and write professionally. I am still "my own boss", I still get to work in bed the majority of the time and I think now I have a better chance of helping people and being happy than I ever did before.
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